For those who still have morning newspapers delivered, sometimes it becomes a game each early a.m. in the dark guessing or actually finding where the paper might be.
Usually, it’s in or about the driveway, maybe, for single-family dwellers. In or about is stressed, because the paper is tossed out of the driver’s side window while the car rolls past by the delivery person.
So depending on the care and timing of the person’s aim, the paper can be in the middle of the driveway, on either side, near the bottom or top, under a parked car, in the middle of the front yard, missing altogether and in recent days found on the far side of a shoveled snowbank.
So far, the paper has never been found on top of a parked car. On the rare occasions, it might actually be on the doorstep. That tends to happen around the holidays when those delivering are hinting for a tip.
For a couple of days in recent weeks, the paper was found nowhere near the driveway, instead located some 30 feet away in the backyard. The bag encasing the paper was torn up a bit each time.
So the best guess was, the neighborhood fox had a bit of fun with the paper bundle for a bit each morning, meaning the delivery person’s aim didn’t suddenly become wild like that of the pitcher nicknamed Nuke in the movie Bull Durham.
The daily morning game of finding the newspaper goes on and on.
– Dave Facinoli