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Thursday, August 11, 2022
Editor’s NotebookEditor's Notebook: Enough with the geriatrics already

Editor’s Notebook: Enough with the geriatrics already

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Bad news for Joe Biden in that devastating New York Times poll on his performance (talk about being whacked by friendly fire): An almost infinitesimal number of those under age 30 want our current president to run again.

And on the other side of the coin, we’ve got Donald Trump, who seems to be catching on that he’s losing his mojo with a swath of his past supporters. And when he gets in that frame of mind, he historically has turned quite cranky. A cranky Trump is no fun at all.

A prayer on behalf of all Americans: Please, big guy upstairs, spare us warmed-over leftovers like Biden, Trump, Hillary Clinton or the like in 2024. I make an exception for Bernie Sanders, if only because it amuses me that the self-professed socialist owns more homes than your typical Rockefeller, and because I am always tickled when one of the fellow residents of my condo association drives up in her Jaguar with the “Bernie” sticker on it, not seeing the irony of it. Fun times.

And I can leave Sanders in the mix for 2024 despite my abhorrence of many of his policies because the powers that be within the Democratic oligarchy will never, ever, ever let him be the nominee, no matter what carnage might result from denying him the nomination were he to get within striking distance. And, as Elvis would say, that’s a fact, Jack. (Then the slightly numbed-up Elvis would shout “stop that plane; I’m a federal officer” at the Las Vegas airport. Oh, you wacky 1970s, we miss you!)

I did see the that Rubenesque governor of Maryland was interviewed by the Rubenesque F. Chuck Todd (that makes three of us!) on “Meet the Press” on Sunday. Oh, Gov. Hogan, please wise up – you’ve got no future in the GOP, whether that GOP is with or without Donald Trump. Just like your father before you, your faithlessness to a flawed leader (whether Nixon for the father or Trump for the son) may be seen by some as an attribute, but will not be forgiven by others. You’re not going to be president or anywhere else near the pinnacle of power. You’re toast.

And that’s a fact, Jack. With which Elvis would concur.

OH, YOU CAN THINK ABOUT IT, BUT DOOOOOON’T DO IT: There’s a video going around, apparently from New York City government officials, telling residents what to do in case of a nuclear strike on the city.

(Wait, what? When did the Cold War come back?)

It is, indeed, a rather unintentionally hilarious video, especially the idea that one should wait in one’s home for directions from the government and the media after the big one detonates over Manhattan. Yep, I can see New Yorkers doing that.

If the gub’mint wants to give me a $500,000 grant, I will do my own what-to-do-if-nuked video for the public. Because the only advice one needs comes from Sheriff Buford T. Justice when he accosted some teen car thieves in “Smokey and the Bandit.”

The good sheriff, played by the great Jackie Gleason, told the boys to wait for the arrival of his associates, who would take them into custody.

To quote directly in a classic line of the 1970s: “Don’t go home. And don’t go to eat. And don’t [bleeeeeeeeeep] with yourselves. It wouldn’t look nice on my highway.”

Good advice in any situation. And Jackie Gleason deserved an Oscar for that performance.

– Scott McCaffrey

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